Marital problems and Solution

UNFAITHFULNESS OR INFIDELITY

The number one destroyer of trust in any relationship or marriage is what is called infidelity or unfaithfulness. To be quite honest, this dangerous character would happen as a result of a breakdown of mutual intimacy in the relationship and a pointer that it is not the cause of the breakdown.

Let no one be in doubt as to whether one is in support of this act of infidelity, rather it’s simply pointing out that people who are really satisfied and feel fulfilled in their relationship will virtually never try to go out to be fulfilled. Often times, this is used as a way of escaping from the pain and difficulties of the present relationship, even at that it should have been resolved straight-up with partner rather than behind closed and secretive doors with someone else other than your partner.

Because, looking for relief of the pain somewhere else, will simply add to the pain and suffering to what was already happening. But if you’re found culpable, then own up to the responsibility of failing to courageously face the part you played in unsettling. Majorly, if the energy expended on another relationship with someone else other than your spouse or partner, then thing would have worked well bringing joy and harmony to the relationship rather than the pain of infidelity.

Inspite of this betrayal, if there is willingness on your part to do whatever is require of you to rebuild the once lost trust such as taking full responsibility for the betrayal, showing remorse and deciding to be committed to developing self, so as to bring back again TRUST, and with this its healing begins. If your ego does not get in the way of your recovery and you don’t give in to frustration, then you will have the opportunity to create deeper and meaningful relationship.

Finally and truthfully answer these questions as it affects the strength of your marriage; Do you frequently, always, occasionally or never agree with your partner about managing your finances

Do you frequently, always, occasionally or never agree/disagree with your partner on how household chores are handled?

Are your goals and values greatly differs from your partner’s? Frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you frequently, never, always or occasionally confide in your partner?

Do you and your partner quarrel and wait for things to blow out of proportion? Frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you honestly laugh together, and how frequently is it, occasionally, always or never?

Do you storm out of the house at any slightest provocation to cool off somewhere? How often frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you and your spouse/partner make independently major decisions from one another? How? Frequently, never, always or occasionally

How often do you and your partner show affection toward one another? Frequently, never, always or occasionally

Is your sexual relations with your partner interesting, satisfying and enjoyable without pretence? Frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you ever engage in leisure activities with your partner? How often, frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you trade blames with your spouse/partner? How often, frequently, never, always or occasionally

Is there any need to control your spouse/partner or you feel he/she is controlling you? How often, frequently, never, always or occasionally

Do you criticize or attack your spouse /partner’s personality? How often, frequently, never, always or occasionally

Ever mock, insult, or use sarcasm on your partner? How often, frequently, never, always or occasionally

Answering each of these questions truthfully would reveal the other side of you that has hidden for so long, therefore work on it…………..

IN-CONCLUSION

Although one cannot whole heartily say these are certainly all the problems of relationship that can come on us, but they are mostly common and which seem quite a universal thing. But you see in all of these problems there are lessons that can be learnt which will reveal and or uncovering some certain hidden aspects about oneself, which causes you to stumble and fall. Unfortunately though, it seems to be preference of so many to take easy way out by simply shifting blame of woes in the relationship to others. For those that are not giving in to excuses and who truly believe that something can still be done to salvage the situation, then I encourage you all to invest yourself in what would bring back that needed connection, love and trust.